Absent – WITH Reason
Absenteeism is something that I’ve practiced pretty damn well over the years in my life, that surely I should be able to explain my absenteeism from my own site. Now, I can tell that you’re rolling your eyes over there… but hear me out… oh, and don’t roll your eyes while reading a computer screen, it’ll make you blind (scientific evidence pending)…
First, a little background…
Scholastically Absent – Badass and super cool
Now I don’t know about the rest of you, but stored somewhere in the recesses of my mind are these great memories of high school. I mean kicking it with riends, trying to standing on my tiptoes so people would think I was normal size, 5am hockey practices, trying to figure out what girls liked, the parties, hanging out in pyjamas all day in the school foyer… It’s funny that I have very few memories of being in class itself.
Actually, that’s not entirely true, I have many memories of making up reasons for why I wasn’t in class, or won’t be in the next or something of the sort.
But really, there were so many legitimate reasons to not be in class like having a concussion (that worked really well), or having your car die (works better if you have an old car to show the teacher, playing on their pity), or running out of gas (you can use this multiple times with the same teacher if you show them that your gas gauge doesn’t work), or being away for hockey (this one needs to be thought out beforehand, and coordinated with the rest of the hockey players, normally works best for taking a friday or monday off and saying it was an extended tournament)…
The most important thing was always to make sure that your attitude fit the excuse, for instance with a concussion you should be kind of dazed and out of it, dead car should be a little hyped up and out of breath from pushing your car mixed with dismay over having such a p.o.s.
But that was high school… that was just training… and sure, you might’ve barely passed as a result and found it hard to get into university and really didn’t learn that much of maths or English or other stuff, but you never need to know those ridiculous things anyway, I mean common, what are they thinking… real life comes afterwards.
Absent in Relationships
Once getting through high school and all those people saying that you’ll just learn to skip things when their difficult and run away from your problems and all that psycho-babble, you have to get into the real world and reach for the stars with your absenteeism.
Do what you wish at work, but you might want to be there from time to time to have some sort of income. You should be able to find that work isn’t that interesting to skip out of because it’s just too easy. It’s high school all over again… If you’re up for it, it’s time to become a really shit friend, bad son/daughter and absolutely brutal boyfriend or girlfriend…
If you can, try to find something in a different country, and book your flight to leave within a week. This is where you are truly going to see if you learned your lessons in school, it’s not about lying, it’s about legitimately having a reason to run so far away from your girlfriend or boyfriend for months at a time without even giving them a heads up before you booked the ticket. Your parents SHOULD be easier to convince as they should be thinking that eventually you’ll be leaving the nest, but this doesn’t always pan out, so do your best. Your friends will be the easiest, but you might still have a few that are difficult to convince.
For them – not for you
But in reality, you’re not being selfish at all. In fact, you’re leaving for your girlfriend/boyfriend not for yourself – to make the relationship stronger and introduce new aspects into your undying love, you have all your lives to be together, if you learn more about yourself now it will make you so much stronger for him/her.
Your leaving for your parents not for yourself – They always told you to spread your wings, find out who you are and find your path. How are you supposed to know such things if you can’t separate yourself from one narrow minded society and see the diversity of culture and humanity in the world. You are just trying to make them proud.
Your leaving for your friends not for yourself – You know that it’s a scary world out there. You know that they may not have the opportunity. The very fact that you have the opportunity makes you responsible to them to go out, learn about the world and y’know… stuff… so that you can come back and discuss it with them in great detail. Watch Good Will Hunting to truly understand your role in this one… you owe it to them to leave.
So you see. It’s clearly not for me that I was absent from my blog for so much time. It was for you, my reader, my friends, my parents. You want interesting stories, those don’t happen when I’m connected to the internet every day. You want me to get off the beaten path, you want me to get lost, and then tell you about the ridiculousness that came about. I owe it to all of you to disconnect from time to time. You want me to live my life while I’m out here and report back. You don’t want me to miss a second. You want me to take up the random guy who invites me to his house, you want me to get on the wrong bus, you want me to be in such a place that the internet (or even electricity) is sporadic at best…
You see, perhaps at the time you start to wonder why I’ve begun neglecting this relationship, why I’m breaking my promise and not keeping you updated. But, if you think about it, it was really in my character, it was implied from the very beginning. It was the reason you started reading me, it was the reason the relationship started. So really… It’s for you that I haven’t been in touch for the last 2 months or so. But don’t worry, I’m back now… I won’t say I won’t leave again. I’ve been known to follow a Shaman into the Amazon, go wandering through the Himalayas and disconnect phones and such…
I’m a flight risk, there’s no doubt, I don’t want you to get attached, don’t want you to get dependent, just want to grow with you… so really, I’m doing it for you… not for me… that would be selfish. From time to time I will be absent in this relationship, and you’re the very reason, so instead of saying sorry, I’ll say thank you.
Thank you for trusting in me, thank you for letting me go, thank you for coming back and reading me again… thank you for giving me a reason to be absent.